Sigh. I have been at the "giving and going to concerts" game since 15 and I can see 60 from here. Everything you say is true and more. Can we PLEASE start the show at 7 and be done by 9? Since I don't drink and thus don't have to pee at shows the lines aren't so bad, and I leave before the last song so getting out is fine, but most shows I want to see happen two hours drive away, so getting out at 11 or so can be a drag. Also, bless the artists making people give up their phones. Concerts without them are SO reliably much better. People still suck tho. I'm listening to the band. Please take your loud conversation the fuck elsewhere you pathetic little prick Ahem.
“The death of ecstasy is not sobriety, it is nostalgia” is... yes. Middle age doesn’t diminish our capacity for feeling but it does complicate our capacity for self-forgetting. At 43, I find there’s simply more self to recall. More history, responsibility, fatigue… not just hearing the music but hearing all the former versions of ourselves who might once have surrendered to it.
I have loved live music from first laying my eyes and ears on Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons at Carowinds amusement park near Charlotte NC when I was eleven. To say I was smitten is an understatement. I've seen more concerts than I can remember, from almost every genre of music. I still get that euphoric feeling from the live music experience (at 64) whether I'm standing or seated. And Prince live in concert? I probably saw him live more than any other artist, and I have to believe you would have had fun. Maybe not the first time I saw him in 1981 since it was at a horse arena in Raleigh where we had to stand. 😊
I saw Prince many times. He played Flipper's Roller Disco on in '81. Flipper's was co-owned by Danny Cordell of Shelter Records--Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers, Leon Russell, and Joe Cocker. I don't remember if they played there. But as well as Prince, Toots and The Maytalls, John Cougar, Black Flag, The Go-Gos played there. Other people mention The Ramones, The Talking Heads, and even Joy Division, who I am pretty sure never toured in the US.
Flipper's is, very sadly, long gone. It was the epitome of a simulacrum and disappeared as a blinding comet. July 1979 to October 1981. Liberty Ross, who was born when it opened, is now operating it as a popup--Rockefeller Center, The Sphere in Vegas. and other places. Now, it is a CVS.
I realize I am the lone contrarian voice at this point; I still love concerts even ones that are SRO, although at sixty nine I prefer seats. I have been going to concerts since I was five. The first concert I attended was Louis Armstrong at the Carnation Restaurant at Disneyland. The crowd spilled out of the restaurant onto Main Street, so my dad held me on his shoulders. Louis was my first musical love before Chubby Checker, Elvis, and the Beatles. I have been moved to tears by genres I never really appreciated: Mahlers' 11th, and most deeply Pavoratti slaying me and 20,000 others with Nessun Dorma at Staples...I saw My Morning Jacket at the Hollywood Palladium on August 19, 2025, and it was as great as any concert I have seen. The one concert I wish I had attended was, my father's first concert, on January 16, 1938, at Carnegie Hall, The Benny Goodman Orchestra. The band came out nervous and flat, but Gene Kruppa took matters into his own magical hands and invented rock drumming on the spot.
"Is it true, prince, that you once declared that 'beauty would save the world'?"
Prince Myshkin, The Idiot, Fyodor Dostoevsky
Vonnegut said something very similar about music.
I am not attempting to change any of the people's replies about concerts, but, maybe, get one of them to reconsider whether she should give it one more shot.
I don't know if beautiful music can save the world, but I know it makes it far more tolerable and occasionally ecstatic...
I thought you didn't like all concerts but I am glad you will still consider seated concerts. The MMJ concert was SRO only and it was still well worth the extra effort. Thank you for your thought provoking post…
Your description of the middle aged crowd, and the sadness of it all, reminded me of the first time I realized that my fellow concert goers (Morrissey, late 90s) were no longer the teenagers I remembered. It’s one thing to watch, say, the Rolling Stones as they age. That’s what they do. But to see the crowd, your crowd, droop into middle age and beyond—that’s a special kind of devastation.
When I first read your post I saw "deviation".... yes, devastation is the right word but the other adds...
I'm 74...woof... I saw my first concert at the NJ State Theater in Trenton, NJ. It was Frankie Valley & the 4 Seasons on my first date at 14... :)
There's a lot to be said for big venues but the acoustics in old vaudeville theaters are amazing. They had to be since the performers weren't mike'd & had to project to the rear of the theater. But I digress.... sorry
Great piece, thanks, brought back a lot of memories.... :)
I went to very few concerts as a young woman, then to a Yes concert at age 48 in a large, packed stadium. I felt less ecstatic (okay, not ecstatic at all) and more like an anthropologist, for all the reasons mentioned. There may have been all of two original Yes members there; it had become its own tribute band. And the fans—I swear to God—had an unnerving percentage of grizzled people hobbling along with canes and walkers.
I went to very few concerts as a young woman, then to a Yes concert at age 48 in a large, packed stadium. I felt less ecstatic (okay, not ecstatic at all) and more like an anthropologist, for all the reasons mentioned. There may have been all of two original Yes members there; it had become its own tribute band. And the fans—I swear to God—had an unnerving percentage of grizzled people hobbling along with canes and walkers.
The intimacy of seeing a real Musician make magic music on an acoustic instrument… All by themselves, quietly… That is transcendent.
To go see a band with huge speakers and production and smoke and a crowd of 1000 people who all drove there in their stupid fucking automobiles ,… All those cars and vans and trucks and buses … Out in the parking lot… All the air pollution… To get there… All the air pollution … to get home … and all the power to run the speakers… And all the lights
All for what?
To titillate some Humans
To give them bragging rights so they can tell their friends, “I saw such and such in concert“… It was awesome.
I would rather watch a migration of frogs cross a country road
I'm 78 and have an awe and love for classical music. I attend the opera regularly. The transcendent gorgeousness of a Beethoven symphony - truly an emotional roller coaster, or the lyrical beauty of a Wagner opera, is something that makes me think- if you haven't experienced it, you haven't experienced the pinnacle of Western music. Upon reading your article I was curious to look up Jack White, whom I never heard of, and then listened to his song Seven Nation Army on YouTube. Almost 1 billion views! The song was embarrassingly devoid of musical inventiveness, a dud in my opinion. That people would go out of their way to see him, and probably pay big bucks too, is a sorry example of mass conformism. How can one compare this hyped-up musical show-business to an orchestral concert performed by hard working musicians under the baton of a masterful conductor, where the preeminent goal is serving the music, rather than putting on a pretentious show, attended by an audience sitting quietly and giving their discriminating ears to the performance? And I bet going to the opera for around $50 is less expensive than a rock concert these days? I often felt alienated as a young person in the rock scene, it had so much cowardly conformity. Hey, nothing wrong with wild dancing and cavorting at a mass gathering, but don't elevate the actual music to something it's not. And it depresses me to see how absent the young people are from classical music concerts, how desperate these operas and orchestras are just to survive. Maybe it takes some people many years to mature to the point that they can divest themselves of the urge to be cool and be able to recognize the difference between genuine creative art and the pretentious products of mass marketing.
Sophia, I will happily join the mass who adore this Substack about the idiocy of masses!
I will join the mass that adores you!
Sigh. I have been at the "giving and going to concerts" game since 15 and I can see 60 from here. Everything you say is true and more. Can we PLEASE start the show at 7 and be done by 9? Since I don't drink and thus don't have to pee at shows the lines aren't so bad, and I leave before the last song so getting out is fine, but most shows I want to see happen two hours drive away, so getting out at 11 or so can be a drag. Also, bless the artists making people give up their phones. Concerts without them are SO reliably much better. People still suck tho. I'm listening to the band. Please take your loud conversation the fuck elsewhere you pathetic little prick Ahem.
“The death of ecstasy is not sobriety, it is nostalgia” is... yes. Middle age doesn’t diminish our capacity for feeling but it does complicate our capacity for self-forgetting. At 43, I find there’s simply more self to recall. More history, responsibility, fatigue… not just hearing the music but hearing all the former versions of ourselves who might once have surrendered to it.
Wait! Not having to be “cool” is the best part of getting older. It IS cool.
I have loved live music from first laying my eyes and ears on Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons at Carowinds amusement park near Charlotte NC when I was eleven. To say I was smitten is an understatement. I've seen more concerts than I can remember, from almost every genre of music. I still get that euphoric feeling from the live music experience (at 64) whether I'm standing or seated. And Prince live in concert? I probably saw him live more than any other artist, and I have to believe you would have had fun. Maybe not the first time I saw him in 1981 since it was at a horse arena in Raleigh where we had to stand. 😊
I saw Prince many times. He played Flipper's Roller Disco on in '81. Flipper's was co-owned by Danny Cordell of Shelter Records--Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers, Leon Russell, and Joe Cocker. I don't remember if they played there. But as well as Prince, Toots and The Maytalls, John Cougar, Black Flag, The Go-Gos played there. Other people mention The Ramones, The Talking Heads, and even Joy Division, who I am pretty sure never toured in the US.
Where is Flippers? Sounds like a cool place. Forgot I also saw David Bowie in Charlotte on his Let's Dance tour. Also incredible. Also no seats, lol.
Flipper's is, very sadly, long gone. It was the epitome of a simulacrum and disappeared as a blinding comet. July 1979 to October 1981. Liberty Ross, who was born when it opened, is now operating it as a popup--Rockefeller Center, The Sphere in Vegas. and other places. Now, it is a CVS.
I realize I am the lone contrarian voice at this point; I still love concerts even ones that are SRO, although at sixty nine I prefer seats. I have been going to concerts since I was five. The first concert I attended was Louis Armstrong at the Carnation Restaurant at Disneyland. The crowd spilled out of the restaurant onto Main Street, so my dad held me on his shoulders. Louis was my first musical love before Chubby Checker, Elvis, and the Beatles. I have been moved to tears by genres I never really appreciated: Mahlers' 11th, and most deeply Pavoratti slaying me and 20,000 others with Nessun Dorma at Staples...I saw My Morning Jacket at the Hollywood Palladium on August 19, 2025, and it was as great as any concert I have seen. The one concert I wish I had attended was, my father's first concert, on January 16, 1938, at Carnegie Hall, The Benny Goodman Orchestra. The band came out nervous and flat, but Gene Kruppa took matters into his own magical hands and invented rock drumming on the spot.
"Is it true, prince, that you once declared that 'beauty would save the world'?"
Prince Myshkin, The Idiot, Fyodor Dostoevsky
Vonnegut said something very similar about music.
I am not attempting to change any of the people's replies about concerts, but, maybe, get one of them to reconsider whether she should give it one more shot.
I don't know if beautiful music can save the world, but I know it makes it far more tolerable and occasionally ecstatic...
Oh yes, seated concerts are the best. This is about standing rock concerts!
I thought you didn't like all concerts but I am glad you will still consider seated concerts. The MMJ concert was SRO only and it was still well worth the extra effort. Thank you for your thought provoking post…
Enjoyed and related to this. Standing at a concert is an insult to the genius who invented chairs.
Your description of the middle aged crowd, and the sadness of it all, reminded me of the first time I realized that my fellow concert goers (Morrissey, late 90s) were no longer the teenagers I remembered. It’s one thing to watch, say, the Rolling Stones as they age. That’s what they do. But to see the crowd, your crowd, droop into middle age and beyond—that’s a special kind of devastation.
When I first read your post I saw "deviation".... yes, devastation is the right word but the other adds...
I'm 74...woof... I saw my first concert at the NJ State Theater in Trenton, NJ. It was Frankie Valley & the 4 Seasons on my first date at 14... :)
There's a lot to be said for big venues but the acoustics in old vaudeville theaters are amazing. They had to be since the performers weren't mike'd & had to project to the rear of the theater. But I digress.... sorry
Great piece, thanks, brought back a lot of memories.... :)
I went to very few concerts as a young woman, then to a Yes concert at age 48 in a large, packed stadium. I felt less ecstatic (okay, not ecstatic at all) and more like an anthropologist, for all the reasons mentioned. There may have been all of two original Yes members there; it had become its own tribute band. And the fans—I swear to God—had an unnerving percentage of grizzled people hobbling along with canes and walkers.
Thanks Beth, that was the other thought in my head.. :)
Thank you for this. I am 49, and I feel like this. I had a panic attack before I left to see his show here in AZ. I just don't enjoy it anymore.
People are also far more rude, violent, and socially reprehensible than when I was younger. It's true. Xx
Kindred spirit!
Great job, Sophia, thanks.
Thank you.
I went to very few concerts as a young woman, then to a Yes concert at age 48 in a large, packed stadium. I felt less ecstatic (okay, not ecstatic at all) and more like an anthropologist, for all the reasons mentioned. There may have been all of two original Yes members there; it had become its own tribute band. And the fans—I swear to God—had an unnerving percentage of grizzled people hobbling along with canes and walkers.
People are stupid.
The intimacy of seeing a real Musician make magic music on an acoustic instrument… All by themselves, quietly… That is transcendent.
To go see a band with huge speakers and production and smoke and a crowd of 1000 people who all drove there in their stupid fucking automobiles ,… All those cars and vans and trucks and buses … Out in the parking lot… All the air pollution… To get there… All the air pollution … to get home … and all the power to run the speakers… And all the lights
All for what?
To titillate some Humans
To give them bragging rights so they can tell their friends, “I saw such and such in concert“… It was awesome.
I would rather watch a migration of frogs cross a country road
I'm 78 and have an awe and love for classical music. I attend the opera regularly. The transcendent gorgeousness of a Beethoven symphony - truly an emotional roller coaster, or the lyrical beauty of a Wagner opera, is something that makes me think- if you haven't experienced it, you haven't experienced the pinnacle of Western music. Upon reading your article I was curious to look up Jack White, whom I never heard of, and then listened to his song Seven Nation Army on YouTube. Almost 1 billion views! The song was embarrassingly devoid of musical inventiveness, a dud in my opinion. That people would go out of their way to see him, and probably pay big bucks too, is a sorry example of mass conformism. How can one compare this hyped-up musical show-business to an orchestral concert performed by hard working musicians under the baton of a masterful conductor, where the preeminent goal is serving the music, rather than putting on a pretentious show, attended by an audience sitting quietly and giving their discriminating ears to the performance? And I bet going to the opera for around $50 is less expensive than a rock concert these days? I often felt alienated as a young person in the rock scene, it had so much cowardly conformity. Hey, nothing wrong with wild dancing and cavorting at a mass gathering, but don't elevate the actual music to something it's not. And it depresses me to see how absent the young people are from classical music concerts, how desperate these operas and orchestras are just to survive. Maybe it takes some people many years to mature to the point that they can divest themselves of the urge to be cool and be able to recognize the difference between genuine creative art and the pretentious products of mass marketing.
always amazes me that people forget their opinion isn't the pinnacle of correctness...